Thank you- for breaking up with me!

‘’You will forever be my always’’- almost everyone heard a sentence like this before from their (ex)-lovers. But let us be realistic, most romantic relationship will end far before getting even close to ‘’forever’’. You may be one of the unlucky ones that needs to be rebuild right now. But are you really as unlucky as you may think? Are you wondering how your colleague got over her ex-boyfriend so quick and turned her physical and mental health into the better at the same time?

 A study by Tashiro and Frazier (2003) assessed the possible positive aspects of a break-up of a romantic relationship and showed that break-ups have the potential to produce positive outcomes. The study included data of ninety-two undergraduates who had experienced a recent romantic relationship breakup. The participants were asked to ‘’Briefly describe what positive changes, if any, have happened as a result of your breakup that might serve to improve your future romantic relationship’’. Their responses were coded accordingly. The findings highlight that personal growth may play a significant role since it may lead to more satisfaction in future relationships. The results show that the ideal coping strategy should encourage that the individual starts to focus more on positive aspects of the breakup whereas minimizing the negative ones. The previous partner may have been good for you in the past but as time changed so did you, or as Marilyn Monroe’s said ‘’Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together’’.

Tashiro, T., & Frazier, P. (2003). “I’ll never be in a relationship like that again”: Personal growth following romantic relationship breakups. Personal Relationships, 10(1), 113–128.

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